A DAY AFTER Senator Orrin Hatch said "destroying their machines" might be the only way to stop illegal downloaders, unlicensed software was discovered on his website.

AMONG THE 16,000 people thus far sued for sharing music files was a 65-year-old woman who, though she didn't own downloading software, was accused of sharing 2,000 songs, including Trick Daddy's "I'm a Thug." She was sued for up to $150,000 per song.

ONLY ABOUT 5% of patents end up having any real commercial value.

NEARLY 20% of the 23,688 known human genes are patented in the United States. Private companies hold 63% of those patents.

IN THE LATEST ROUND of a 13-year battle over the title "Surf City USA," Huntington Beach, Calif., filed for a trademark last year. A state senator from Santa Cruz retorted, "You can't trademark a state of mind" and proposed a Senate resolution declaring his city to be the real Surf City.

"SENSORY TRADEMARKS" include a duck quacking (AFLAC), a lion roaring (MGM), yodelling (Yahoo!), giggling (Pillsbury), and a "pre-programmed rotating sequence of a plurality of high intensity columns of light projected into the sky to locate a source at the base thereof" (Ballantyne of Omaha).

PATENT LAWSUITS have more than doubled since 1992.